Sex, Dating & Relationship

Eight Ways To Know If You Are Only A Side Chick To Him

Are you suspicious of your man? Do you think you may not be the only one he’s with? There are red-flag moments you need to look out for.

Eight Ways To Know If You Are Only A Side Chick To Him

Side chick, the description many women dread in their relationship or marriage. A side chick is woman who performs the duties of a girlfriend or wife secretly.


When infidelity ends a relationship, trust people to partially blame a side chick and call her names like a homewrecker.

However, it is important to note that many women who are called side chicks don’t even know they are. Few of them assume that they are in a relationship with a single guy.

The truth is when it comes to cunningness, some Nigerian men deserve a platinum award along with a certificate of distinction because they possess the skill of making a woman think she is the only “significant person” in their lives when, in reality, she is the other woman or one of many others.

There are several scenarios where a lady assumes she and a guy are the “IT” couple, only to realise that he has been cheating on her with another lady. After further investigation, she discovers that the “other lady” is the wife he didn’t tell her about.


Below are some of the red-flag moments you need to look out for.

1. No PDA

What is a relationship without a public display of affection? An illusion! While it’s not necessary for your boyfriend to kiss, hug, or grab you in public, there are certain things he would do that will tell the world your relationship to each other.

Let’s say you are both having dinner in a restaurant, and you grab his hands. If he quickly removes his hands and cautions you not to do that again, you should know that he is hiding something. And that could be his actual wife or fiancé.

2. He Plans And Times His Visits

If your boyfriend regularly gives you a specific date and time when you two should meet and doesn’t want any interruption, take it. Though it’s possible that he does this due to the nature of his job, it is still odd.

The point is that guys who have side chicks often organise days and times to balance the relationships between their girlfriends or wives and side chick in order to avoid a clash. So, if you think his visits seem too structured and have a particular pattern, it’s advisable to investigate.

3. Secret Date Spots

This red flag, in a way, corroborates the first point. Dating a guy that only takes you on a date to a secret place or a place people hardly patronise, hints that he is either ashamed to be seen with you or wants to avoid running into someone he knows, which could be another woman.

An average Nigerian man avoids taking his side chick to a popular restaurant or other places.

4. He Doesn’t Pick Up Your Calls

When you call him, he doesn’t always pick up, and when he does, it’s in the middle of the night with him whispering. I hope you understand.

If you notice this happening frequently, here are a few questions to ponder:

Why did it take him this long to pick it up?
Why is he whispering?
Why couldn’t he send me a message?
Why couldn’t he call me back?
Providing logical answers to these questions might open your eyes to the truth.

5. Not Knowing Anything About Him

When your friends ask you about your boyfriend, all you can say is his name, the type of car he drives and probably his house. Girl, you need to wake up. No true man keeps everything about himself private, even from the one he claims to love.

If every time you attempt to know more about your boyfriend by asking about his family and friends, he takes offence, you better start weighing where you’re standing on the main chick and side chick scale.

6. Never Defines The Relationship

Defining a relationship can take some time, and men use this to their advantage. For example, you and a guy might be intimate, and while you’re feeling like there is something more between you both, he only sees you as insignificant.

So, if your boyfriend has not clarified the status of your relationship, consider the possibility that he only sees you as an object of desire.

7.No Pictures Of Him

There’s a chance that he doesn’t want any of your friends to see you both together, so he avoids taking pictures with you.

Do you have a boyfriend who doesn’t like to strike a pose or take a selfie? Beware that he is preparing grounds for denial when you accuse him of dating you.

8. Secrecy

Committed men are often eager to share their personal life details with the woman they love. If your man keeps secrets from you, it shows that he doesn’t trust you, a behaviour that isn’t exhibited towards the main chick.

In addition, there is also his refusal to meet your friends, doesn’t make you a priority, has zero regard for you and makes zero attempts to know you.

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